捐血回忆录

三年了， 事隔三年我才敢从上一次的害怕事件中走出阴影。。。回想起那天兴至勃勃去捐血，躺在折床上，看着那个透明的袋慢慢地装满了我身上流出来的血，事成后还约了两个好姐妹吃午餐，站在食物挡前不到三分钟，忽然感到头晕旋转，手脚没力。。我快手一搭在其中一位姐妹肩膀， 向她说：“喂， 我很晕啊！！快d 扶着我！！” 怎么懂，她竟然推开我的手并用着一把开玩笑的声音向我说：“喂，唔好玩啦， 快d拿饭！” “唔是呀， 我真的很晕,很唔舒服！” “飞，你看她，还要玩喔”，飞走前来，一副奇怪兼好奇的眼光望着我，转头向美说：“喂，唔是喔，阿仪的嘴唇很苍白，仪，不要玩啦！” 我一定是平时玩人玩得多，今次真的遇到狼来了的故事事件，晕都没人信！！炸到！！我真的无法让她们想信我的不舒服，为由出绝招，我立刻用不知哪来的力量抬起我那已经没力的右手，举起三根手指，用尽我身上仅有的力量来发出微微的声音：“我发誓，我真的要晕了！！” 碰，我晕了！！美，飞当时吓了一大跳，丢下她们拿着的饭碟，快快地将我慢慢往下倒的身体扶着， 隐隐约约， 我听到美很吃力的向飞说：“飞，快d来帮手， 我就快撑不住阿仪gam重的身体！！” 啊！！！晕都还要给人炸!! 气死。。。当然，我不到十分钟就慢慢回复意识， 慢慢好转起来。。真的是虚惊一场..phew...（晕倒原因：我捐血的前一晚睡的不是怎么好，加上我只吃了一个小小的面包，身体状况并不适合捐血）

这次我也是与这两位姐妹吃午餐，我看到了捐血的布条， 捐血的情形，这一次我的感觉应该没有错，是啦！是可以再去捐血啦！！是时候要摆脱阴影，再一次躺上光辉的折床上，让我的鲜血去拯救人类。。哈哈。。（讲到天花乱缀，好像武侠小说的英雄，其实躺在折床上怕到半生死 =.= ) 终而言之，只要睡好，吃饱，身体好，捐血时应该鲜少发生以上捐血晕倒事件，这次真的要谢天谢地，只因我昨夜睡的好，捐血前吃的非常饱，身体刚刚好， 天时地利人和的情况之下顺利地做了一件好事。。。：）

Disappointment

Again, it disappoints me. I thought i can have a good timetable so that and again, i can have more free time to myself. but somehow and somewhat, no matter how i try to arrange my timetable, i couldn't make a good arrangement. I have been somewhat accepted the truth that i have to study for an extra semester though i need not and should not. Fine, and now, what i hope for is only a good timetable, more free time...but the truth shows me my hope is all down. It SUCKS...stupid timetable. It hangs somewhere in the middle of the day, then 2 hours break and then class for an hour then again 2 hours break and another 1 hour class. Come on.

From the statement above, it proves me something and it is something that i can't deny. I dislike my school life and i dislike utp. I feel stucked!! It is like someone is using a rope and tied me up and i got no way to run away from it no matter how hard i try to loose it. I tried to accept the fact that accept the worst case and find peace in the darkness theory. it makes sense but somehow, i really need time to endure with the stupid fucking hanging time. Arggggh..i think i am pretty disappointed with the things that happen around me again and again!! NOT FAIR AT ALL!! It sucks...People always tell me about enjoy your school life while you can, you will feel regret once you are graduated and feel appreciate about your school life, come on!! don't tell me all these crapping stuffs, what i need the most is get out of here, get out of the school life, get out and leave me alone!! I have been in school for 6 years just for a stupid degree and i have no idea on what i can apply in my life, i am so empty in my mind, all those theories that i have learnt is like something unrelated to me, why on earth i need to study something that i don't know what to use for in life?? what?? power distribution?? power transmission?? it is all crap to me..but ironically, it keeps on pulling me back with different reasons and different situations that make me can't run away from it!! good!!

Take Care, My Dear Zest

Dear Zest,

       A sudden call from you and an unexpected outing with you and of course, the most unexpected news from you. I have no idea that you are going to leave Malaysia and heading to UK, we have been talking about it since last year and i thought you have cancelled or maybe postponed you decision. I have been wondering what makes you this busy lately until you have no time to meet me and now i know and understand that you have made up your mind and you are going to your dream place or maybe a step nearer to your dream. I am really happy for you...no matter how many obstacles that you have to face and yet, you make it. Zest, I feel really really proud of you. We have been talking about going outside to the world together, to study together, to have fun together and now, you please enjoy my part first and i will try my best to join you later so that we can continue our fun and our dream together. Wow, there are plenty of dreams waiting us to be fulfilled and we have to make it comes true one by one :)

        Remember, whenever you feel tired or you need a friend to talk with, there is always a friend waiting you here, there is always a shoulder free to lend it to you when you need it. I know and understand that you are tough and strong enough to face the unknown and uncertain path in front of you but you have to give yourselves some rest space. Don't over used your mind and energy on the things that you are doing. Keep things simple. Take care, my dear Zest.

Warmest Regards,

Sarah

新年快乐

今天心血来潮，写了一点与新年有关的字句，望每个人都能快乐，安康 :)

兔气扬眉新一年，
来了福报又来财，
福星拱照旺你家，
到了年尾笑哈哈，
庆团圆时倍感恩，
丰衣足食身体壮，
年年有余祝安康。

好像有点"leong"...hahaha..

The Way We Are

At last, I watched this movie that I have been longing for at least 1.5 years. Before that, I have no way to watch this movie as ipoh cinemas never showed it and it showed only in KL cinemas. I told my friends that i like to read book without any peak point, I like the plain and slowly tell us their life and their living kind of book and yea, this it is..it's exactly showing what i like the most... It is such a good movie. There is no story line, no peak, it just some ways slowly telling us the way of people living, their way of talking, their way of eating and even the way of them making fun of themselves. It's so simple and yet it leaves us space to think. Not much people can make such a theme of movie to this level of presenting, so it's pretty amazing..haha..a nice movie that i would like to share with you.

The meaning of LOVE

Love is beyond everything else - anxiety, desire, hope, resentment. 

Love is openhearted, demands nothing, and needs nothing

It is more likely to visit when our desires are quiet, when we don't need or want much, and when we accept that everything we love is not permanent but is with us at this very moment! 

From the book of Daniel Gottlieb - Learning from the Heart

This is what love means for and this is the kind of love that i am looking forward. A love that never ask for returns and a love that never counted by how much or how deep it is. 

secret rainbow

i feel calm when i listen to this song...

so, i would like to share this with you...

i wish you happy always